Friends are important. They can inspire, support, and make our lives more fun and exciting.
Sometimes making and keeping friends isn’t always easy, but it’s always worth the effort.
Here’s some advice on how to meet like-minded people, keep friendships going, and what to do when there’s a fallout or even bullying.
Making friends and meeting people
Friendships can be made in many situations, like when someone new comes to your school or work. You can also make new or closer friendships with existing students or work people.
Another way you can make new friends is to try new things like:
- accepting invitations to parties
- going out to see bands/festivals/live shows
- joining a volunteer or community group
- joining a sporting club
- signing up for a short course in something you're interested in.
Remember that making new friends can take time. Just because you try something new and don't end up with lots of new ‘best friends’ doesn't mean you should stop trying.
There can be times when it seems there's no one around, or you don't feel confident about meeting people.
As well as watching what more social people do for tips on making friends, you could try:
- asking people questions about themselves
- listening to others more than talking about yourself.
How to maintain friendships
Like all relationships, friendships need work and attention to keep them healthy.
You can do this by:
- making the time to hang out
- planning things in advance
- talking regularly
- listening to each other’s problems
- celebrating each other’s successes
- supporting each other through difficult times.
ReachOut’s Friendship Action Plan has lots of information about how to be a good friend and how to understand if your friendships are healthy. ReachOut also has lots of great advice about how to help and support your friends.
Recognising peer pressure
Sometimes friends can encourage you to make bad decisions and sometimes good friendships go bad.
Peer pressure is when you feel like you have to do something you don't want to or shouldn't do so you can fit in and keep your friends. It can be hard to be sure you're doing things for the right reasons.
But arguing or fighting with your friends doesn't necessarily mean the end of the friendship. Friendships can survive conflict if that's what you want to happen.
There are ways to recognise when friends are making you unhappy and what to do when they are.
About bullying
Bullying is not the same as teasing. ReachOut has a great description of how to spot the difference.
Bullying is when a person, or a group of people, repeatedly and intentionally use words or actions to upset another person and harm their wellbeing.
It’s not the same as having an argument with someone or simply disliking someone, it’s more about repeated behaviour by someone who has control over another person.
What can I do if I'm being bullied?
We have more information on how to deal with bullies (both online and in real life) on our cyberbullying and dealing with bullying pages.
You can also read more information about bullying on the Better Health Channel and take the Bully Stoppers pledge.